From The Diary Of Nijinsky

"I do not want the death of the senses. I want people to understand. I cannot cry and shed tears over what I write, but I cry within me.
I will tell the whole truth, and others will continue what I have begun. I am like Zola, but I want to speak, and not write novels. Novels prevent one from understanding feeling.
I am in a trance, the trance of love. I want to say so much and cannot find the words...I write in a trance, and that trance is called wisdom. Every man is a reasonable being. I do not want unreasonable beings, and therefore I want everyone to be in a trance of feelings.
The whole of my wife and of all mankind is death....
I want...to heal my wife, but I cannot be healed. I do not want to be healed. I am not afraid of anything except the death of wisdom. I want the death of my mind. My wife will not go mad if I kill her mind. The mind is stupidity, but wisdom is God."